Lucky, I have a good didi (gay brother) always console me and advised me to take it easy because that is my babe family and he is not flirt around with other friends or mates to dump me aside. In fact, I really understand the situation but my heart really in fraction emotion because I really dunno what to do during that occasion. I hate being alone and I hate my home as well.
Frankly speaking I don't have much friend and not to mention previously a straight nerd like me is impossible wanted to get gay friends. Worst stilt even now I am queer guy but I still don't have any of them except my didi because I am too fugly moreover gay life is cruel. Lucky me are attach with my babe who is quite charming and handsome but really dunno why he love me.. many doubt is it. He can easily get someone who is hot and handsome guys....sigh.
If you really ask me I really can't answer that question but being a fugly gay like me is feeling very insecure because I might get dump anywhere and anytime. For time being, what I can do is try to change my look and kick out lard and get slimmer is my only option. But recently I loss 2 inch, where previously is 38 inches.. I know I am fat and deserve to be tease but folks please wish me luck because I will try my best to fit in this circle and I know gay life is realistic and cruel. May due to this reason recently I very determine to put on weight.
Sorry for being out of the topic, I am still very sad and always throw my tantrum toward my babe because he promise me first rather his family. But there is nothing I can do beside accept the fact and anger is begin to swap off and my heart of course are in deep sorrow and sad. Now what I can do is pretend that I am okay and feeling is getting better even though we had a good date on the New Year last time. I really miss him, carving for his kisses and cuddle as well... Baby I really miss you and love you.
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